Babies' Grandparents

Many parents, myself included, seem to have some difficulty with the grandparents watching their baby-usually because grandparents tend to "spoil" their grandchildren much more than the parents would.

When you have someone in your family babysit, getting them to understand that you want certain things done in certain ways with your child can be a little frustrating. If they once changed your diapers, they will usually be quick to criticize you for telling them what to do.

If this is a problem, you definitely need to speak up. But instead of telling them what to do, remind them which (healthy) foods your child is eating now. Also, give them an update on all the amazing things their grandchild can do now: scrape his plate after dinner, pick up his toys, take off his own clothes at bathtime, fall asleep on his own if tucked in by 8:00 p.m.-things like that. Tell them about the things that are impressive signs of his physical advances and mental maturity.

This will usually help get them to follow at least some of your rules (often without even realizing they were doing it). Be realistic, as well. Most grandparents are looking to spoil, coddle, and love their grandchildren. And sometimes that's got to be okay. Your child's lifetime of sweet memories with grandma and grandpa is a little more important than eating dinner at exactly 5:30 p.m.-don't you think?

I have this problem quite often with my daughter's grandparents (my parents). They tend to-as most grandparents do-completely spoil her. And yes, it's all right most of the time, but there are times when it's difficult to get them to follow any of my rules. This strategy that I've discussed above is something I read in a Parenting magazine. It has helped. I'm not asking them to be "jailers". I'm just asking that they have some sort of rules for Angelina. But it's nothing worth losing sleep over. She is well taken care of when she is with Grandma and Grandpa, so there really isn't too much that I have to complain about. I was spoiled by my grandparents when I was little, and I turned out perfectly fine. (I think.)

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